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MaMa-2

MaMa-2

Absence makes the heart grow fonder. This may sound a conditional affection, but It rings true to the relationship between my Mom and I. Both of us have a strong self-awareness yet possess quite different personalities. Mom never stops trying to provide an example to follow while I always attempt to affect the way mom behaves or thinks. We are both influential figures in our respective social networks. However, we seldom lead a life that is different due to each other’s particular preferences, requirements, or even complaints. But it does not mean I have been completely immune to Mom’s emotional issues and her passions – these can run high if I react against her even if I am not deliberately doing the opposite of what she wants me to do. For example, Mom thinks I take all of my friends for granted. This is because I rarely, if ever, contact them and even do not respond to the messages and letters I receive on special festivals. She also says that I am too outspoken in front my bosom buddies and that I leave without acknowledging their help. From my Mom’s point of view, my attitude to ordinary and close friends respectively is one of unconcern and offense .”People are not always what they seem to be and why do I need to be obligated to specifically react to their ever-changing minds and feelings?” I once replied to mom’s criticism. “Do not judge others: analyze what has gone wrong with yourself” Mom schools me again. “Dear mom, unfortunately, there is nothing wrong with my life, but one of the best...
“Wish you an auspicious start to the new school year in HKU”.

“Wish you an auspicious start to the new school year in HKU”.

“Wish you an auspicious start to the new school year in HKU”. This is a message I received a few days ago from a friend who just flown to America to attend a business college there. Surely, it is a blessing but I feel reluctant to send some seemingly positive feedback to her, for example, wish her a promising school time as well. “Why don’t you try being a little more encouraging?” You might ask. Someone even say “You are not supposed to be jealous, are you?”. Well, I would only say that I won’t blurt out any encouragements or supports to a thing which my friends or family members are aiming at without being convinced of the positive influence it will have on their life. In a addition, people are apt to be ambitious for a worthier future, however, when they fail to meet their expectations they would be overwhelmed by feelings of disappointment, anger, or distress. it may even result in some mental disorders if they experience a harsh reality of life which is in contrast to what they imagined. So I would endeavor to provide a timely help when they need to overcome the obstacles that be placed on their path rather than playing a role as a catalyst to boost their ego at the very beginning. In fact, I once asked my friend about why she decided to study overseas when she just began to submit the application documents to the schools. She gave no reason for her decision, instead, she complained bitterly that preparing for TOEFL is so laborious and she worried herself sick about the...
MaMa-1

MaMa-1

My mom seldom, if ever, pushes me, but frequently devotes herself to different careers. She once told me that she was not ambitious for me, but I should be able to afford the social security. Admittedly, I was not on the same page with my mom when referring to social security as an indispensable part of our lives. She may never, to my knowledge, considered what it exactly was as well. I eventually managed to steer our conversation away from if I could survive on no money by saying that ” Mom, you are my life insurance. ” Afterwards, I found that I spoke it up not from my mind but heart. I did feel safe staying with my mom, for she never slapped me as my father once did when I failed the texts, and she was never over scrupulous about my life as my stepfather has been, making me feel no obligation to be outstanding. She is absolutely assertive to set rules at home and work, actively to be a leader and still feels comfortable when there are no followers. Like mother, like daughter, I was born to be a leader, and need to lead myself to become a follower of my mom when the situation calls for it. Basically, how others see me is the least of my worries, but I would not disregard my mom’s anxieties for the same issues, which are not annoying but endearing, troublesome to deal with but highly productive for both of us to experience together. Consequently, we may better understand each other and feel more qualified to be daughter and...
You are such a Xiaoniu

You are such a Xiaoniu

“Selfie” One day, I was asked if I could recall the last time I need to deal with a difficult person, I said I could rarely remember any of them because I myself might be the most difficult one, troubling others very frequently. I once lost the control of my emotion and shouted to one of my bosom buddies for no reason. Knowing that I did it with the intention of hurting her, she did not react and attack to defend herself. Few hours after my impulsive response, I received a message saying that, “I would be rather willing to back you up when you feel like stepping on me. However, I did not try calming you down at the moment when I could see some opposite effects by dong so” Her message was the end to my awful emotion and also a fresh start to our relationship. I once became very impatient to teach my mom how to use an electronic gadget, the tones and words used by me turned to be impolite even sarcastic after repeating the same function for several times. Unfortunately, I was not aware of my rudeness until she lowered her voice to a whisper. As a heavy silence blanketed the room, I could not help speculating how a thunderstorm would come. When I finally screwed up the courage to look at my mom she had been already moving her attention to check some invoices. Thankfully, she didn’t seem to be emotionally involved which partly reduced my feeling of guilt. However, if I had an another chance to teach my mom, no matter what...
Fed by Pains

Fed by Pains

It just so happened that I got a sore throat while practicing the the pronunciation of Nepali letters. But my hard-working could not be the possible cause, since my pronunciation of Nepali still made no sense to the native speakers. The sore throat turned out to be a domino effect to my health, from headache to stomachache, from diarrhea to fever, I finally stopped myself to feel the pains passively, and thus to focus on an array of preformed questions. Such as what the pain exactly is? Who is really suffering from the panic attacks? If there’s no subjective feeling of the pain, will there be any hurt exists objectively?   I felt a little better as a result of questioning myself and subsequently recalled an article which defined the pain as a survival mechanism and pointed out that pain is an output of the brain, not an input from the body. These ideas may not just be some seemingly paradigm shifts, but can be actively used to alleviate the aches. However, constantly bothered by the uncomfortable sensations, I felt too faint to apply the theories into into practice. As always, it was the words from Master brought an end to my suffering. He said If you had believed in causes and effects, you would not feel painful mentally;  If you had some energy to call me, you ought to have enough strength to make your messy room spick and span instead of still feeling too weak to get up; If you could penetrate into the truth that there was in fact nothing bad ever happened to you,  you...